Sari Time

Well Colin Ali and I are back in India, monsoon in Kovalum and bless its cotton socks it hasn't rained on us. Ali seems to love the place as much as we do. We're staying in the Hotel Seaface (has a website)which is alittle more up market than the Rockholm and a little dearer but has a pool and as it is monsoon weather the sea is too rough to swim in, so a pool is a must.
Been lazing around, sleeping late, wandering those shops which are open and enjoying the sea food. Ali has discovered she enjoys prawns! We asked what one fish was in a restaurant today and they said they didn't know as it was the first time they had had it! Don't think it was a blow fish but avoided it just in case. They've enjoyed butter fish +++ and red snapper - but not quite so much.
Went in an auto to Kovalum junction today which Ali loved, really liked seeing a little of real India. Off to Tirunelvelli tomorrow via Kanya Kumari, Nancy's driver is picking us up in their new Ambassador, delivered just after I left last year, new driver too! We are going to be staying in Prem's cousin's flat near Palay bus stand. Handy for my dentist too if I need her. Weather says it has been 31 degrees today here, but we have had a cool sea breeze. Tiruenlveli is 32 tomorrow and Delhi currently in the 40s, Hot Hot Hot!

My father died last week on 22nd May, so we have all been down in Romsey organising the funeral, tidying up the house etc as my step brother wants it to go on the market this week. It's all been rather hectic and a very sad time for us all.
The funeral went well, I managed to deliver the eulogy, thanks to a lot of support from family and friends.
The picture below is of Katy and I with him, not at his best, as he didn't normally use a wheelchair, but fairly happy after my return from India.

These holidays have seemed rather strange, in some ways, a lot crammed in and in other ways, no rest at all.
Week one was spent down with Dad, preparing for the funeral, juggling finances and other such tasks as well as grieving and comforting Dad after the death of my stepmother. I came back home on the Wednesday and had some time with Ali and Colin, then on Easter Sunday, after a quick Easter egg hunt in the garden... who says 19 is too old for an Easter egg hunt?... it was back to the airport and a flybe down to Soton again. We've been staying during recent trips south, in Chilworth manor which is very comfy, an old manor house and now an hotel, lovely grounds and a pool and leisure centre in the grounds which has helped me to de-stress at times.
My sisters and Kathryn arrived on Monday and the funeral was on Tuesday. A little strange as it started at the crematorium and was then followed by a service of thanksgiving in the Abbey where they were married almost 24 years ago. Dad was great and managed to walk back down the length of the aisle with H's two eldest grandchildren supporting him. Extraordinarily moving, the entire congregation stood as he passed them. It was obvious what a real effort he was making. We then had tea and biccies provided by the MU in the church rooms.
C, K and A all came home on the Tuesday evening, F and J on the Wednesday and I stayed till the Thursday evening. Lots of banking and negotiating, Barclays and Nationwide really helpful Abbey unhelpful to the pint of obstructive. Dad is determined to get himself back to their house soon, but it is going to require a lot of organisation and a 24 care package in place. Not easy when we are all so very far away.
Got home Thursday evening and spent most of Friday Saturday at home sleeping or relaxing and unable to get any enthusiasm up for anything much. Saturday we went out looking for cars as my new Golf plus is a little large for town use and so Colin will probably use it. Looking for something a little smaller for em and think we may have found it ... rather nice... more soon!
One more day off tomorrow then back to school, hard to believe it is the Summer term already.

Does anyone have this week's Church Times? I'd like to see the death notice for my stepmother which I believe is in it.

I was in Waitrose yesterday trying to catch up with things after being down south with my Dad, when I saw the following with their display of cards and chocolate eggs:
Happy Easter - 10-13th April
Since when did Good Friday and Holy Saturday become a part of Happy Easter?

I am off south again next week, Hilda's funeral is on Tuesday, so I'll stay a couple of days with Dad too afterwards.
Hope to spend next weekend chilling out and having a bit of a rest before school starts again on the Tuesday. That's after a visit to the dentist, I managed to find an NHS dentist yesterday and what's more got a cancellation appointment for next week so that's one item on the checklist done.

My step mother died suddenly on Saturday morning, very peacefully, thankfully my father was able to get to her bedside in time to be with her. Sadly she has been in hospital for the last few weeks since a fall at home and Dad has been stranded in the nursing home since 17th Feb. so they've not been together for a while. My middle sister was down at the weekend and was with them at the hospital, along with Hilda's daughter in law and grandson. Little sis did a great job in supporting Dad and Hilda, What a star. The support that the three of us have for each other and Dad is just amazing. Maybe something to do with losing Mum when we were comparatively young, or maybe we're just lucky to be so close in our hearts if not in miles! Dad and Hilda were married for over 23 years both of them having been widowed before they married in 1985, for a second time each. Not a bad tally these days, two happy marriages each.
My fund raising Bridge day on Saturday went well although hearing about Hilda just before the start was rather distracting. We raised around £750 on the day through tickets, raffle and donations which is fantastic.
Thanks to all those who helped either on the day or in advance.
Read the most recent Marian Keyes over the last few days, a great chance just to disappear from the world without having to think too much about what I was reading although it was written in 4 different voices which takes a while to get used to! It has an insight into violence against women in relationships and the strange way these relationships continue in spite of this.

It must be almost Spring as the clocks go forward on Saturday night / Sunday morning. Funny how it's OK in the Winter when they go back but horrid in the Spring when they go forward!
I can't believe it is almost the end of March already! I've been flying solo in school this week as the VP and P are in Sweden. How come I got to go to Bradford last week and they get to go to Orebro, not fair! Still it's snowing in Orebro and it was 17 degrees in Bradford.
Mother's Day last Sunday, C took me overnight to the Orocco in South Queensferry. Very nice, a fabulous meal so I can highly recommend it. It looks like a traditional pub from the front, but they have put huge windows at the back and the view across the Forth taking in both bridges is amazing.
I'm running a fund-raising Bridge afternoon next Saturday in aid of the Trust. Lots of folks helping in so many ways so thank you. Folks putting out tables, baking, making sandwiches, serving food and tea, selling raffle tickets then clearing it all up again at the end. thanks to you all I really appreciate your support. I'm off out to India again in the Summer and will be taking £1000 as a donation. Fingers crossed I have a house too. Dr Prem who found my last one, has come up trumps again we think! A large house on the main road between the bus stand (Palay) and the railway gate which means I still won't be held up by the level crossing Yo! The railway was out of use for the entire 6 months of my stay and even when I went back out in August was still out of use so no inconvenience at all to me. Trains in India are both very slow and very, very, very long so it can take 15 minutes for one to go past.

Happy Dewi Sant (St Davids Day)everyone, I'm half Welsh so Mum always remembered it in our house.
It seemed for a while today as if Spring was actually arriving, it was warm enough to have the back door open and I even hung out the washing! Then I had to run and bring it back in as the hail came down half an hour later. Thought it was the first of April when jokes were played! Still the daffs will be out by the end of this week, so we may have turned the corner.
The last couple of weeks have continued to be difficult, my father is still in the nursing home having had his stay extended by a week. Today my stepmother fell and has fractured
her pubic bone. We will here tomorrow what the plan is for her recovery, they seem to be suggesting that she go home. I would have thought it was the ideal opportunity to have an enforced rest in hospital. I spent time this evening phoning the hospital then the nursing home then the hospital again to coordinate getting her to a phone and a phone to dad so they could speak to each other. Being 500 miles away makes it all so much more complicated.
My aunt died last week, she was my dad's brother's widow, so he was upset not to make the funeral. These two pictures of her wedding have my dad as an usher in one and he and my mum, who were going out at that time in the other, she looks so quiet and shy, not like herself as I knew her at all! I reckon she was about 21 at the time!

I got some odds and ends of jobs done at home this weekend which I have been putting off for ages like replacing the back door handles... which had begun to seize up... before I got home one day and found I couldn't get into the house! I carefully removed the old handles, fixed the door so I didn't get shut out! Took the old handle down to homebase and matched it up with a suitable replacement, making sure the holes were the same distance apart and the handle mounting was the same length etc, got it home and discovered that although all the relationshops etc were the same, the entire thing was set 1/2 an inch lower so ended up having to redrill everything anyway... why change something which is a standard size! That all meant out with the woodfiller and repainting half the door. I had not anticipated that however it is done. Next job was fishing some of the minute green duckweed out of the pond which had magically appeared there within an hour of the pond being filled with water, don't know who told it there was a pond there but the word must have got out really quickly. I know it is good for the pond, but I don't want it to completely cover the surface, so out I went with Ali's old fishing net! I went looking for a water lily for the pond yesterday but apparently they are not available till next month. Have to be patient then! I don't want to transfer the fish till there is some shelter for them from passing moggies and herons.

I spent the first part of this week in Romsey staying with my Dad and step-mother. Dad has Parkinson's and life at home is getting difficult for them both. The house is a bit chaotic and after Dad had a fall last week, my middle sister dropped everything and went to stay and to help. She took her laptop and hoped to be able to do some work while there but there was just no free time. Someone needs to keep an eye out all the time in case Dad fell and so there was no time she wasn't either helping or sleeping! What a star!
The spare bedroom is inaccessible as lots of stuff was being stored there, so we are used to sleeping on a lilo when we go down. F was there until Saturday and I arrived on Friday evenig and stayed in a hotel until next day when F went home. I cancelled my half term plans of going up to stay with younger sister J in Leeds and stayed in Romsey till today. I spent Monday getting the TV aerial on their roof fixed by someone before it fell down on next doors roof!
The real job then began of trying to find some respite in a nursing home for dad for 2 weeks to give H a rest. Dad is not too happy and nor are we, but I think it was essential to give them both a time to rest and take stock. I managed to find a place to my relief, but it all seemed to happen too quickly for any of us. He moved in on Tuesday, not a very nice room which is probably why it is available for short term respite, however the Matron of the home is nice and it seemed like a good place, no bad smells or bored looking residents. Had a good report from the English version of the Care Commission, so that's a good thing and the local reputation seems to be good. They even lent H a zimmer as Dad has him with him and she had been using it too at home. Lots of money a week in case you wondered, self funding but they will be entitled to a refund of £103 NHS nursing costs. Not a pleasant thought if it has to be used long term.
Horrible horrible horrible thought to see our Dad needing care and not being able to do it ourselves.
I spent Monday evening trying to get the spare room at Dad's sorted so one of the beds is now available in case they need a carer to stay over or for one of us next time we go down... I'm getting too old for a lilo, it's an awful long way back up although getting down is ok!
I came up via Leeds to Aberdeen today for a couple of days with C before home again and ready for inservice at work on Monday. The plane did a very bouncy landing at Leeds/Bradford airport having threatened not to stop there at all as the weather was so bad! Skidded on landing from the bounce which was jolly excited, the stewardess then came along with her "Ladies and Gentleman as you have probably realised we have just landed at Leeds Bradford airport!" She and everyone else burst out laughing. poor pilot. Aberdeen was much more gentle but raining!

For a long time I have had goldfish who lived in a baby bath sunk into the back garden, but have hankered for a real pond for ages. With one thing and another though it kept being put off... however... At the weekend we spoke with the chap who fixed our garden fence and arranged for him to come and dig one for us on Monday,on Monday though it snowed and how.... so eh went skiing instead as one does. On Tuesday though eh got stuck in and within the space of a day, we had a pond. I've not moved my fish yet, and yes they do survive the winter in a baby bath. So here it is in all its glory. Mind you it has frozen over now and has a layer of snow over the top of it.